I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
