like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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