I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
third nipple confirmed
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
