the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
