Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
