do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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