Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
