I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
