turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
