It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
