I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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