Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
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