It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
