i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
they need to just BURY HIM!
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
