Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
