That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
