I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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