Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
