The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I'm too high and old for this...
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
