Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
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