better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
