thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
