Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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