is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
