i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
