a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
