So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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