are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
