? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
