Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize
