I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
