Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
