So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
