check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
