And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I just want nice things and good sex
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
