Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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