I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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