I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize