i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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