Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
