whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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