Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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