I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
