You made me cry and you don't even care
so explain again why im purple
no
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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