Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
