i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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