Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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