Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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