I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
