do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize